The word surreal is often misused, with the term being used to describe situations or events that are, at best, slightly unexpected or unusual. André Breton (1896 - 1966), one of the founders of the surrealist movement and the author of the Surrealist Manifesto, noted the imprecise use of the term nearly a century ago and stated that he wished that an official stamp existed that could be used to certify genuine surreality.
Breton's wish has finally been granted. The Surrealist Certification Company is now open for business. Using equipment such as spectrometers, hydrometers, astrolabes, sextants, wands, quadrants, opaque and non-opaque lenses, vials, retorts and immersion tanks, items submitted by the general public with be tested for surrealist content. Any item scoring 0.873097985 or more will be ceremonially imprinted with a stamp embossed with Breton's signature and returned with an annotated business card. Any item scoring less will be passed to our disposal department for incineration. All items received will be catalogued, with this catalogue being publicly available. Disputes will be referred to our arbitration bureau. As a guide for applicants, this picture shows a genuinely surreal article: an MOT reminder from National Tyres. Breton's signature can be seen below the letters m, i and n of the word reminder, slightly to the left of the partially personified tyre. If you wish to submit an article for scrutiny, please contact zshboo@gmail.com in the first instance. We look forward to hearing from you. Please see below for articles already submitted, most recent first.
Breton's wish has finally been granted. The Surrealist Certification Company is now open for business. Using equipment such as spectrometers, hydrometers, astrolabes, sextants, wands, quadrants, opaque and non-opaque lenses, vials, retorts and immersion tanks, items submitted by the general public with be tested for surrealist content. Any item scoring 0.873097985 or more will be ceremonially imprinted with a stamp embossed with Breton's signature and returned with an annotated business card. Any item scoring less will be passed to our disposal department for incineration. All items received will be catalogued, with this catalogue being publicly available. Disputes will be referred to our arbitration bureau. As a guide for applicants, this picture shows a genuinely surreal article: an MOT reminder from National Tyres. Breton's signature can be seen below the letters m, i and n of the word reminder, slightly to the left of the partially personified tyre. If you wish to submit an article for scrutiny, please contact zshboo@gmail.com in the first instance. We look forward to hearing from you. Please see below for articles already submitted, most recent first.
